numb all over

last patient of a 30 day pediatric rotation (pediatrics aka army of walking germ bombs waiting to sneeze and cough all over you while their overly aggressive parents scream and demand the best treatment that they see on tv)

mother runs frantically out of the room she was placed in and grabs me. "ive been waiting 5 minutes!"
"ma'am you are next, just wait for us to be done with the other patient and we will be with you in a moment"

she starts flipping out and goes back into the room.
so we finish up the patient and walk in, "my son is numb all over!!! he has no feelings anywhere!"
we look at the mother, look at the son (who is 19 yrs old and just laying there)
"when did this start "(feeling a bit nervous thinking of things that can cause such neurological issues)
"today, he was fine in the morning and now hes numb, and hes slow and confused"
i look at the son, and excuse myself from the room. come back with a bag of doritos and offer it to him while the pediatrician is doing a physical exam. kid takes a handful, i look at the mother and tell her "next time his eyes are bloodshot you might want to ask him how much he smoked up before you bring him to the doctors office".